People DO NOT understand social anxiety disorder, or manic depressives and they sure as hell do not even know what a Borderline Personality Disorder does!
I am so sick and tired of it.
Sick and Tired, of course, being two words I use a lot. BECAUSE that is how I feel a lot. I feel sick, physically ill. I had gastric bypass surgery since I was too fat, so okay, then they took out my gall bladder because didn't you know when you have bypass surgery, you get gall stones... no I didn't. Now, because I have a smaller stomach, shortened intestines and no gall bladder, my liver makes too much gall, this gets dumped into my intestines, and can I tell you something, my bloody colon hates my guts - pun intended.
I've lost an entire 100 kilograms, that's a whole other overweight person right there, but my knees have taken a knock, and the cartilidge is "broken" in a medical term I can't even pronounce. I have excess skin, but hey, at least I'm not fat.
I'm tired a lot too, because when you are manic depressive energy is the last thing you have. I can't wait to get home, take my medication, and go to bed. I'm also an insomniac, amazingly, so I don't sleep without the aid of a lovely drug called Zolpidem. It's my ticket to an oblivion of nothing, and I don't have to worry about anything. I still wake up tired though, always one step from exhaustion.
Food was my crutch all my life. It was my wall of protection against the world, and the fat was the prison I built, the cage to keep the hurt out. I've lost food and my cage, and now I'm left with Social Anxiety, because just like when I was fat, I still can't function in society.
Try to find a boss that understands this? That understands your need to just hide sometimes, that believes me when I say "I am sick"...
Good luck. There is no such thing.
